A Primer of and Homage to Tony Romo
As I’ve stated before, I am an adamant fan of the Dallas Cowboys. And with that, I am also a bashfully unabashed fan of Tony Romo. As the joke goes—I am a “Romosexual” (indeed, this is my go-to Fantasy Football name). Being such a fan of Romo, I hear all the lines. “Romo is a choker.” “Romo folds under pressure.” “Romo wears his hat backwards.”
Inevitably, whenever I hear someone spew a line such as the preceding, I can’t help but hark back to the Seattle-Dallas playoff game in 2007. Of course, this is the infamous “Romo fumble” game. Without fail, Romo’s critics point to this game as the “Exhibit A” of their opening (and normally their closing as well). And while I cannot deny the deflation and frustration I suffered because of that game, I cannot help but smile at the irony, because I would not have even been in a position to be deflated or frustrated but for Romo.
For illustrative purposes, we have to go back…way back, to 2001. The year Aikman was waived. Maybe it was the arrogance that came from having a 90s dynasty. Maybe it was bred from ignorance. Whatever the cause, the Cowboys were simply unprepared for Aikman’s departure despite his history of concussions. There was no Aikman protégé, no Aikman successor. What followed was a mind-numbing parade of mediocrity, a choir of journeymen including such yawn-inducing names as Hutchinson, Testaverde, and Bledsoe.
This point is highlighted by the fact that Quincy Carter was, far and away, the Cowboy’s best option at quarterback during that period. Truth be told, he could have been passable had he been able to conquer his demons.
But he was not, and this is the Cowboys, not peewee—passable will not pass. And then, the moment…an undrafted free agent named Tony Romo entered the fray. A fan favorite due to preseason flashes, his moment in the sun came after replacing Bledsoe. From that point, he started every game and made the probowl his first half-season. Had it not been for Romo’s spark, the Cowboys would not been in a position to “choke” in 2007.
Then there is the game itself. Romo remained the holder despite the fact that he was no longer the backup quarterback. And then Romo drove the Cowboys down the field and put them in a position to score.
Yes, Romo had a fluke turnover. Yes, Romo deserves the “blame” for the fumble. But he also deserves the credit for putting the Cowboys in a position to blow it—for quite some time prior to that season, the Cowboys were too terrible to blow anything of note.
So, let’s truly get to the meat of this. Romo’s quarterback rating ranks second all-time. Again, all-time. He is above names like Young, Brady, and Montana.
But, again, that has little to do with how Romo does under pressure. Well, when discussing fourth quarter quarterback ratings, Romo is the best active quarterback. In fact, he is far ahead of the second place quarterback—Romo has an average fourth quarter rating of 101, and Aaron Rogers’ is 97.
In the face of these hard facts, Romo critics will failsafe to the age-old ambiguous “it” argument. Now, whenever I hear the term “it” when describing something other than an unnamed object, I have the sudden urge to rip out a soul or two. Nothing decries a “fan’s” ignorance like a reliance on silly clichés, and the “it factor” is my least favorite. My hatred is also compounded by the fact that the people ignore the last premier quarterback at whom that term was levied (*cough* Peyton *cough).
But, in the end, my point is admittedly undercut by the fact that the Cowboys have only won one playoff game under the reign of Romo. Alas, my only point in this rant is that Romo has all the tools necessary to shove the “it factor” into the throats of those who spew the line.
And now for something completely different—a list of my favorite Romoisms. This list is not exhaustive, and it will be supplemented forevermore. Without further ado, and in no particular order…
(1) Romosexual
(2) Romosapien
(3) Romo Cop
(4) Romophobe
(5) Romo Polanski
(6) Papa was Romo-stone
(7) Ro-Ro-Romo your Boat
(8) Stop, before you Romo
(9) Ro-Mo Dancers
(10) Hip-hop a Roooo-mo
(11) Romo Jones (shout-out to the Olympics)
(12) Romolicious
(13) Romo Candle
(14) Romad
(15) Aromotherapy
(16) Theory of Romotivity
(17) Romo arigato, Mr. Romato
(18) Romoerotic
(19) Romology
(20) Ro-yo
(21) Wake Me Up, Before You Romo
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